I usually avoid these topics, but lately stuff has been happening here in Mississippi that gets me all fired up.
I’m about as tolerant as a person can be. My motto is live and let live. If you want to do something, knock yourself out, just don’t try to cram it down my throat. I think there are good people and bad people, good Muslims and bad Muslims, good Christians and bad Christians, good teachers and bad teachers. It’s our job as people to use our intuition and fact-finding abilities to discern which category people fall into before we become too intimately involved with them.
That said, I don’t understand the gay/lesbian lifestyle. I don’t in any way hate gays or lesbians or transgender people, I simply don’t understand them. I’m not opposed to those folks living their lives as they see fit. I’m not the Judge of anybody. And I have some super cool gay and lesbian friends. We’re friends despite our differences.
Likewise, I don’t understand the Mormon or the Muslim faith. Again, I’m not opposed to any Mormon being Mormon or Muslim being Muslim and living their lifestyles, I simply don’t agree with them or understand them. And I don’t HATE Mormons or Muslims, I just don’t understand them. I have some very fine Mormon friends. That does not make me RIGHT any more than it makes Mormons or lesbians or Muslims right. It makes me DIFFERENT from them.
Our differences are what make life interesting. Our differences are what make us unique. Being different is okay. But, it is NOT okay to hate anybody or shun anybody because they are different. And by different, I mean not like me (or you).
Here’s where I start to get a wad in my panties – people who are living a lifestyle that others do not understand, DEMANDING special treatment or compensation because they are denied a particular service. I’m going to use the wedding cake company example; the baker who refused to make a wedding cake for a gay couples’ wedding. I’m sure you’re all familiar with this. The gay couple sued the baker because the baker refused to make them a wedding cake. Why?
I get it – it’s called discrimination and we’re not supposed to do that. But, let’s look at the other side of that coin. Why should the baker be denied their rights to follow their faith? The world must not discriminate based on race, color, sexual orientation, or RELIGION. The baker was being true to their right to lead a christian lifestyle and suddenly the court system tells them they can’t do that. WHY? They have rights too!
Why didn’t the gay couple simply find another baker? By insisting that they are RIGHT and deserve compensation means that the baker must be tolerant of their lifestyle but the gay couple did NOT need to be tolerant of the baker’s right to practice their religious rights as Christians. I don’t get it?
If you are a same-sex couple and want to get married – go for it. Just don’t DEMAND that the world go along with you. If you are a baker who only wants to bake wedding cakes for traditional male/female weddings, then so be it, that’s your right as, not only a business owner, but as a Christian. Personally, I think the baker should sue the gay couple for discrimination against Christians. What’s fair is fair, right? The baker had to be tolerant, the couple got a million bucks. Not fair.
I don’t care who comes to my inn for a good night’s sleep and an awesome breakfast the next morning. But, everyone who walks through my doors must treat me and everyone else within my walls with respect and must tolerate everyone else’s life choices. Isn’t that how the world is supposed to work? It’s called common courtesy. I don’t expect everyone who visits to pray like I do. I don’t expect everyone to hate peppers or coffee as I hate peppers and coffee. And gay couples are just as welcome as straight couples. All I ask (oh Lord, I’m going to sound like Aretha Franklin here) is for a little R-E-S-P-E-C-T.
I may not understand your choices, but I’ll tolerate your decision to live that way. Likewise, you must tolerate me and all of my quirkiness. If you can’t do that, then I guess we won’t be friends. Just don’t sue me because you can’t tolerate MY choices. We all have rights.
If you don’t want to come to Mississippi because law makers enacted legislation to protect the rights of business owners, then don’t come. That’s YOUR right. Mississippi will still be here for those who are tolerant and we’ll welcome you with open arms. Come one, come all, just be respectful. If you can’t grant everyone the same courtesies you’d want granted to you, then we don’t want you here.
And with that, I’m jumping off the soapbox. I’m sorry if I’ve offended anyone. It was not my intent. I’m simply trying to understand why certain things seem to only go one way. I getting tired of intolerant people demanding tolerance. Sheesh.
This is where I usually ask a question, but I’m not asking a question today. Feel free to comment however you feel inclined. I’m open to all sides here.
Word of the Day: Insessorial
Fun fact about me: I rarely use social media as a political soapbox. I just got carried away today.
Original post by Jansen Schmidt, April 2016. Photos courtesy Google Images.
Well said, Patricia. Every person is free to choose their own path in life, but expecting everyone else to look at things the same way you do is delusional. I believe it’s possible to love each other and respect each other without completely agreeing with certain nuances of lifestyle. We’re so lucky to live in a free country where we’re allowed to make those personal choices. Whether or not we agree with the baker situation, it’s a little scary that the government can legally force someone to accept another person’s viewpoint.
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Amen. The government – the judicial system in particular – has no right to tell us how to live our lives, so long as we’re within the confines of the law. It’s getting so ridiculous.
Thanks for stopping by and weighing in. Have a great week.
Patricia
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Replace the bisexual couple with a black couple in the wedding cake scene. The wedding baker chooses not to make a cake because they do not want to make a cake for black people. They may even use religion as their excuse.
It’s not about “special treatment.” The black couple wanting a cake is not demanding special treatment.
Two other issues with the wedding cake:
1) It is a thought exercise, and not a true story. Most importantly, the idea that the “black” couple “sues” the shop owner is introduced to villainize the black couple. It is a biased thought. Without the “sue-age” this story would be about a mean shopowner refusing to confront their biases and maintaining a racist policy against black customers.
2) “Freedom of religion” is not under attack because your religion is whatever you choose to follow from the bible. If you want to defer to the bible to justify your biases or bigotry that’s a problem. During the civil rights era the southern christians frequently said that interracial marriage was an affront to god. And even earlier, during slavery, the bible was used by plantation owners to justify a master-slave relationship. If you asked them why, they would say “God.”
This article is not about people overreaching for tolerance, it is about you being uncomfortable. I’m sorry you are uncomfortable with people asking for cake. It’s only cake. Imagine how they feel.
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Hi Kristen – I’m not uncomfortable with this topic. And I am NOT bigot. This issue is just frustrating because we live in such a sue happy world. Business owners used to have the right to refuse service to anyone for any reason. Period. A convenience store owner could refuse to sell a Snickers bar to a shoeless kid. Does that mean he hates people who run around barefoot? No. It’s his right as a shop keeper. The “big brother” complex is getting too darn big if you ask me. Little mom and pop shops can’t even keep their doors open any more because anybody can come in and sue them for some perceived grievance and win. It’s just not right.
If someone won’t sell me a cake – or a coke – or a Snickers bar because I’m a 50-year-old white woman, then I’ll take my business elsewhere; I won’t sue them for discrimination.
My point was that we all have choices and we live in a sue-happy world.
Thanks for stopping by and weighing in.
Patricia
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The gay/lesbian people I know don’t want special treatment, just equal treatment. It isn’t a “lifestyle;” they’re just like us, except they happen to be attracted to others of the same gender. Granted, I don’t understand that myself, but I can sympathize with them. Most of us don’t choose who we’re attracted to; neither do gay people.
IMO if someone goes into business to serve the public, then they need to serve the public, not just those they agree with. That is, provided they pay for services received, don’t trash the property and so on. OTOH, an organization formed to serve only those of a particular belief (i.e. churches) should have every right to serve only those people.
I do agree with you that the lawsuits go too far, and I can’t see why an LGBT couple (or their supporters) would want to give their business to someone who doesn’t think they should have the same rights as others.
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Exactly, Jennette. It’s about anyone, black, white, purple, gay, straight, young, old, demanding something. And absolutely, if you have a business that’s serving the public, the ENTIRE public is who you should be serving. I’m not sure why, in my example, the baker didn’t just bake the damn cake, or why the denied couple didn’t just go somewhere else, but it happened and it’s sickening. Too many lawyers getting rich off of “sensitive” people.
And, I don’t know why any church (well maybe one or two) who don’t welcome any person through their doors. Isn’t that what churches are supposed to do? It’s all mixed up and backwards. But, life is getting strange.
As always, thanks for your support and for weighing in on the topic.
Patricia
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