Valentine’s Day Fail

Here we are at February 14^th already. Valentine’s Day has arrived again. Time to show your special someone how much you love them. I know, I know, you should do that every day, but today is the one day a year when you should really treat your sweetheart to something uniquely special. Something out of their ordinary. Something frivolous. Nothing says, “I love you,” like wasting money on something only the receiver will appreciate and enjoy. Like flowers. Or a bottle of their favorite Prosecco.

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The Baer House Guide of What Not To Do At A Wedding

The Baer-Williams House was the scene of a very lovely afternoon garden wedding a couple of weeks ago. Bride and groom wanted to keep things low-key and stress-free. We were expecting about 30 guests for a 4:00 ceremony on a gorgeous Saturday afternoon.

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When Life Throws You Challenges – Musings From an Exhausted Innkeeper

Whew! I’m glad that’s over. Ever have one of those weeks? My last week was jam packed with inn guests, meetings and special events. I mean jam packed!!

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Things Forgotten

So another week is upon us and I find myself wondering: what left behind items am I going to find today? Last week was epic for people forgetting stuff. We hit the Mother Lode of things forgotten. Every day we came upon some poor item left behind in one of the guest rooms.

Oh sure, we’ve found items before now, but nothing of significance. Quite a few times I find little pills on the floor or on the bathroom vanity or even in the bed. I’ve often wondered if I should call the departed guest to let them know that someone forgot to take their medicine (I’d hate for someone to have a heart attack because they failed to take their preventative pill). But then I follow that up with, “what if an extra pill just dropped out of the bottle and if I call them, they’ll panic and take an extra one and have a heart attack or something because I’ve frightened them?” It’s such a quandary.

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Valentine’s Day Wrap Up

So the BIG long weekend is nearing completion. Time to go back to work. Well, for most of you. I’ve been working all weekend and it’s been great! Full house for Valentine’s eve with delicious breakfast treats on Valentine’s morning.

The red velvet waffles were a hit even though they were sort of a brown-gray-pink color. I used a lot of food coloring too, but they still weren’t all that red after cooking. The batter was a killer hot pink color though. They looked like they were going to be red. Oh well, I just slathered on a little extra cream cheese icing and it was all good. Add some Baer House eggs (a house speciality) and some bacon and a fruit parfait and you’ve got yourself a sweet feast.

Anyway, we had two couples celebrating their anniversary; one just completed their first year of wedded bliss (aw), the other 13 years. That was fun. Another guest surprised me with a small box of chocolates and chocolate covered strawberries. That was unexpected and very sweet!

And my own sweetie stopped to get be a bouquet of candy hearts on his way home from the store that morning. All in all, a good weekend.

How about you readers? Anything worth sharing? We romance writers like to know these things. Fodder for our books you know.

Have a great week!

Word of the Day: Zymotic

Fun fact about me: I’d rather have flowers than chocolates for Valentine’s Day.

Original post by Jansen Schmidt, February 2016. Photos courtesy Google Images.

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Dating Advice From A Former Family Law Paralegal

Image courtesy Google Images

As a lot of you know, I worked in the legal profession in California for, many, many years. Thirty to be exact. Thirty very long years. A good chunk of those years I worked in the family law arena. Yes, that is as horrible exciting as it sounds.

Photo courtesy Google Images.

Sure, I’m a little jaded smarter because of it (who wouldn’t be?) but I’m also a better person. And, because I’m a giver, I’m going to pass some of that wisdom on to you, my loyal and faithful tribe.

You’re welcome.

First of all: if you just recently split up with your spouse, it’s NOT a good idea to bring your new “sweetheart” to your first appointment with your divorce lawyer. Yeah, don’t do that. You just look like a cheating fool and I don’t have one iota of sympathy for you.

Photo courtesy Google Images.

Second, if you met your current spouse when he or she was married to someone else, then they divorced and married you, but now they are cheating on you – don’t cry about it. You knew they were unfaithful when you met them. What makes you think they’re going to be faithful to you? That makes you an idiot as far as I’m concerned and I don’t have one iota of sympathy for you.

Third, if you fall into one of these categories – stop your sniveling. I call it as I see it and so should you. Sure, love is blind and all of that (bleh), but divorce is eye-opening. And expensive. Use your noggin people and save yourself a few hundred thousand dollars down the road.

Photo courtesy Google Images

And men, if you’re dating a woman who has 3 kids from 3 different fathers, please, please, wear a condom. Every single time. Because, chances are . . . . Just saying. And, yes, she is most likely living off of support from those other poor suckers men and therefore not interested in getting a job. Which means that you will be contributing to her “stay-at-home-mom,” status. After all, someone has to stay home with those illegitimate brats. You very likely might have to get that second job. And, no, I don’t have one iota of sympathy for you. Did you not even consider that this might happen to you?

That last one, applies to women as well. If your new man is paying child support to more than one woman, well, first of all, that’s less money in his pocket for you, and second, if you eventually have a child with this man, that’s less money in your pocket for that baby. Just saying. No, I don’t have one iota of sympathy for you either. Did you not think that maybe he might be a – oh, I don’t know – a player, a use ’em and lose ’em kind of guy? Think about it.

Photo courtesy Google Images

I think you can all see a trend here. I pretty much don’t have any iotas of sympathy for these losers. Not that everyone getting divorced is a sex-starved loser with illegitimate children, but if you find yourself suddenly a single person jumping back into the dating pool: start at the shallow end and wade in before submersing yourself completely. Slow down. Being single is not the trauma you think it is. Think. Do your research. Do the math. Ask the hard questions.

Photo courtesy Google Images

That is all for now. If anyone needs more post-divorce dating advice, feel free to contact me. My fee is considerably less than an attorney’s average hourly rate. But, I caution you to contact me BEFORE saying “I do.”

Image courtesy Google Images

What advice do you have for divorced daters? Have any funny experiences to add to this list? I love a good should-have-known-better tale.

Word of the Day: Wampum

Fun fact about me: I love to shop from catalogs.

Original post by Jansen Schmidt, January 2016. Photos and images courtesy Google.

 

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Would You Keep Reading?

Photo courtesy Google Images

Early this year, I started working on my latest book, the second in a series, which starts with a book I’ve called The Ties That Bind. If you’re interested you can check out my storyboard for this book here: http://www.pinterest.com/jansenschmidt/the-ties-that-bind/

Here’s an excerpt from the second book, Broken Ties:

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And, Thank You For That Little Reminder

So, it was an average day, like any other. Sort of. It was actually a holiday and about a bazillion degrees outside. I was sitting at my computer writing, like a good little writer does. After adding several thousand words to my current manuscript, I decided it was time to call it a day. Have a brewski, watch some t.v. and relax.

So there I sat, relaxing and drinking beer. Until I realized that my ring finger on my left hand was throbbing something fierce. I looked at it and thought, “Hm. That looks a little red (purple actually) and swollen. Wonder why?”

Photo courtesy Google Images

Must be the heat, I decided. In an effort to relieve the pressure on my finger I wiggled my amazingly beautiful wedding ring around the swollen appendage in an effort to remove it. Pretty ring wouldn’t budge.

“I’ve got to get this thing off!” I twirled the golden sphere and pulled it and yanked on it, applying spit, soap, lotion, ice, everything I could think of to get the blasted piece of junk off my finger. Finally, after much sweating and swearing the dang hunk of obnoxious metal came off. But my finger . . . holy macaroni . . . it was burning and throbbing at almost unbearable proportions.

For a week I iced it and even tried wrapping a very small Ace bandage around it. Swelling did not go away. After another week, I decided it might be time to see a professional.

My regular doctor was on vacation so I was “squeezed in” to see her associate.

Photo courtesy Google Images

The doctor took all of two and a half minutes to look at my finger and tell me it was swollen. (“Ya, think?” I should have been a doctor cuz I figured that one out right away.) He sent me for an x-ray, which of course came back all clear, nothing cracked, snapped or popped inside. He prescribed a ten-day regime of Ibuprofen therapy for the swelling and told me to come back if didn’t get better.

And then it happened. On my way out of the doctor’s office he, a perfect stranger, years younger than me, said, “Looks like in just a few months you’ll be fifty. Don’t forget to schedule a colonoscopy along with your regular annual physical.”

Fighting the urge to flip him the bird with my not swollen middle finger, I smiled (sort of) and said, “Thank you.” And then I silently added, “Asshole.” Like I needed that little reminder.

I have a swollen finger for no apparent reason, I can’t wear my wedding ring, which upsets my husband who thinks I’m using this as an excuse to pick up guys (like who’s going to want a 50-year-old woman with a swollen purple finger), and for the next few months I get to look forward to my annual exam complete with colonoscopy!

I’m a lucky girl!

And here’s a little tip. It’s funny, short, and includes a very short history lesson. Check it out.

So, how about you? How’s things going in your world? What little “reminders” do you wish you hadn’t gotten?

Word of the day: Ecclesiology

Fun fact about me: Sometimes I can whistle and sometimes I can’t. And it’s always when I really, really want to that it won’t happen.

Original post by Jansen Schmidt, July 2013. Photos courtesy Google Images. Video courtesy YouTube.

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