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Posts Tagged ‘mom’

This week, I am quest blogging over at Making The Days Count. My cyber friend, Clay asked me to participate in his Tuesday’s Tune inspirational lyrics blog. I willingly agreed because Clay always strives to be positive and has many good things to share. (more…)

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This post is dedicated to my wonderful mother, who left this earth on January 11, 2008, after a very long battle with two forms of cancer.

On this day in 1939 my beautiful mother was born, the last child of seven, to a farmer and his ailing wife. She spent the first 30 years of her life in Minnesota, where she married and gave birth to 2 children. In 1969 she moved with her family to Placerville, California, where she spent her remaining 39 years.

She was my friend, my confidante and so much more. And, because I think this kid is just too darn cute, I’m posting another video from Kid President in honor of my mother and all of my friends who have known the joys of motherhood. I hope you enjoy.

Happy birthday, mom. I love you and miss you so very much. My life was profoundly changed with your passing. You shall never be forgotten.

Word of the day:  Ovolo

Fun fact about me:  I like pickles on my tacos.

Original post by Jansen Schmidt November 2013. Video courtesy Kid President (YouTube.com)

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About a month ago I was nearly killed by an innocent chair. No. Not really. I was nearly killed by a not-so-innocent chair. Okay, okay. I was using a chair as a step stool and I slipped off the chair and that chair almost cut me in half. No. That’s not true either. I did slip off the chair, but it only felt like I was being cut in half. How could a chair cause such damage and pain?

manila folderI also had a small battle with a manila folder not too long ago, which caused copious amounts of blood to gush from my finger. Yes, that’s right. I almost bled out from a cardboard cut.

I sense skepticism. And, that’s okay. My point is, seemingly harmless objects can cause great harm. Be careful out there my friends. There are dangers around every corner, even in our own homes.

For example, my mother had a lethal weapon that she used on occasion to inspire fear in those who knew her best. I’m sure you all can relate to – (cue scary music) The Mom Voice. You know the one. It’s especially  damaging when combined with the use of your full legal name – first, middle, last. Ah, now you know what I’m talking about. That sweet voice that soothes and comforts can cut you in two if you’re not careful. I encourage you all to be on your best behavior when you’re around your mom. Do not become victims of The Mom Voice.

Side note: This only works with an exact mother/child biological relationship so don’t try The Mom Voice on your husband because it won’t work. If you say “James Euripides Higgenbottommellonworth,” he’ll only look at you like you’ve grown a second head. Whereas if James’s mother says, “James Euripides Higgenbottommellonworth,” he will cower in fear and go to any length to please the woman. You’ve been warned. Use The Mom Voice only on your own children.

And do not – ever – use the mom voice on your own mom. Trust me. Don’t. Do it.

Photo by P. Rickrode - 2003

Photo by P. Rickrode – 2003

I’ve discovered that I have a lethal weapon as well. My eyes. While usually very big and dark and expressive, my eyes can turn into flaming daggers if needed. I have to use the flaming daggers on occasion when someone says something so utterly stupid that I am rendered speechless. How else can I express my level of absolute disbelief? My husband has been the recipient of the flaming dagger eyes. He encounters The Look when he says things like, “that’s not my job,” or “what’d you do with my this or that?” Like I’m responsible for knowing where all of his things are at any given moment. See? The Look.yellow lab

But, the creature who possesses the absolute most innocent of deadly weapons is the domestic dog. Dogs can emit a fart that would kill the Jolly Green Giant and all of his jolly green friends. Our super sweet, big dumb, dorky, absolutely lovable, yellow lab has been known to clear a room with one tiny fart. Sometimes, HE even leaves the room because the smell is so bad. I can’t tell you how many times we’ve had to hit the pause button the the tv remote due to an unexpected explosion of dog flatulence. How can something so awful come out of that sweet boy?

So I ask you dear reader, what harmless lethal weapons have you encountered in your lifetime? What should I be on the lookout for as I go about my life?

Word of the day:  Yapock

Fun fact about me: I used to wear my brother’s hand-me-downs.

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