I have a love / hate relationship with Facebook. As a fledgling author, I understand the importance of building a brand and expanding my presence on social media sites. I’m trying to do this and to be as active as possible without giving away too much personal information for hackers or offending too many people.
I try to take notice of what my cyber friends are into and to be part of discussions where I feel I can make a difference or add some witty thought. I’ve learned who to avoid at all costs; you know, those “special friends,” who seem to only post negative stuff or comments about how sick they are or what’s wrong with their kids, cars, lives, etc. That’s just boring and nobody wants to hear about it.
I have some friends who only post inspirational quotes and some who are always posting questions or taking surveys. Others only beg people to buy their books. Some only offer one lopsided political commentary. And I have some friends who are all over the board with comments; good, bad, funny, sad, etc.
What I don’t “get,” are people who post something along the lines of, “I ran 47 miles today. I am so sore I don’t think I’ll ever be able to walk again because of the horrible shin splints, blisters on my feet, and aching calf muscles.” How are people supposed to comment on these types of posts? They did something really remarkable and impressive, but then they complain about it. Are they seeking recognition for the accomplishment or sympathy for the pain?
Facebook has quickly become a forum for people to be narcissistic, especially since the introduction of “selfies.” But if you truly enjoy doing something, should you be complaining about how bad it makes you feel? I mean, if it hurts when you bang yourself in the head, I’m thinking you should probably stop banging yourself in the head. Problem solved. Don’t keep doing it and then complaining about it because I for one, have no sympathy. If you do something awesome, be proud of it and graciously accept the commendation you receive. If you’re hurting and need virtual hugs, then just admit that you’re having a bad day and need some cyber sunshine. I’ll be the first to give it to you. But, it doesn’t work both ways. That only makes you look . . . I don’t know . . . confused. Or not very bright.
For the narcissists, if you want people to think you’re a badass, then don’t follow up the Herculean feat by admitting that you suffered injury. I mean accomplishing something one time and suffering pain because of it is understandable and you’re a badass for doing it. But every day? If you keep doing the same activity every day and you keep getting hurt, I’m thinking you’re not badass at all. You’re a ding-a-ling. If you keep coming home bloodied, bruised and broken, you must not be very good at whatever you’re doing and thus not badass at all. Right?
I’ve seen people post pictures of big horrible bruises, blackened eyes, and bloodied lips that they’ve suffered from wrestling, or judo, or running marathons, or some other such activity, yet they continue to participate in the same activity. If you’re looking for sympathy people, you’re not getting it from me. Keep doing it if you love it, but suck it up and don’t whine about the pain. I mean, should we praise the bruise? Is the broken arm or bloodied limb cool? Should everyone aspire to accomplish the same thing?
I’m just not sure how to comment on these posts. Should I say, “Gee, I’m so glad you’re in pain?” “I’m rejoicing in your agony.” “I wish I could hurt so bad like you?” “I want to run marathons too so I can have those awesome blisters.”
The same thing with people who always post about their dogs or kids puking. Does the world really need to know about these events? Kids and pets get sick. It’s not a news flash. Should we all slide down this slippery slope of negative narcissism? I’m thinking this is some kind of a sickness.
Anyway, I’ll get off my soapbox now. But, I do wonder, what are your thoughts about Facebook posts? Do you engage in “discussions” where the original post is both good and bad?
Word of the Day: Limbus
Fun Fact About Me: I enjoy wearing high heels.
Original post by Jansen Schmidt, May 2015. Photos courtesy Google Images.
I am tired of the “look at me” posts. Three or four a day about me, myself and I are too much. It spams up my feed. I don’t think they ever ask themselves, “Will anyone care?” I have a post in the works about this, but could get in a little a trouble for it. We’ll see….
I tend to be self-effacing to keep from sounding braggy, so that may be what that person is doing.
There is a way to make lists and I plan to start on a couple this week.
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I am so with you Susie. Look at me and how terrible my life is – those are the kinds of posts that just make me gag. Enough already. But, then there are the political ranters, too. Uggg. I try not to engage.
But, I’m sure folks are probably tired of my snarky comments all the time too. It’s hard to find the right balance.
Thanks for stopping by. I’m looking forward to your post. Have a great week.
Patricia
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Keep the snarky comments coming!
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Right? I never comment on those (because I don’t know what to say) and I always wonder if I should “like” such posts…does “liking” it imply I like that they’re in pain, or that I feel their pain or something else they can misconstrue? Facebook etiquette…so confusing, which is why I’m not on it all that much. Except to harass a few particular people. 🙂
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So you understand then? Whew. Another reason to really like you. I thought I might be the only one. FB is creating a generation of socially inept people if you ask me. It should be called socially inept media. I think it’s a great forum for introverts. I’d be willing to bet a lot of those people making those kinds of posts would never dream of saying that stuff out loud.
Anyway, I’m glad you pop over to FB once in awhile. I do so enjoy poking fun of cats. In only the nicest of ways of course. 😉
Have a great week Coleen! I appreciate your support.
Patricia
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I completely feel your pain, Patricia! Facebook has created a public platform for people to talk about things they should not be talking about. What ever happened to it being rude to talk about money, politics, and religion? And that’s ALL that people seem to discuss on Facebook. I will not engage in these types of posts (even if I agree with them) because it’s the wrong forum and more often than not, I could give a rat’s patooty. I don’t go on social media to talk about the political injustices of the world or whine about my miserable lot in life. Nope, I’m there to keep in touch with people who interest me and brag about my cats. 😉
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Oh Lord, another cat lover. You’ll have to stick with CJ and gang up on me.
And I have definitely learned who to engage with and whom to avoid on FB. I have one “friend,” whose posts are always about something being wrong with her. Really? Every single day there is something wrong with you? Wow. Sucks to be her. And then I found out that she’s a motivational speaker. REALLY!?! Holy crap. Don’t sign me up for that class.
I enjoy your posts and your pictures so please keep them coming and I shall try to be avoid offending your cats. Please know that any jabs are in jest.
Thanks for visiting. I hope you’ll get another exciting birthday next year. And how did you enjoy Sedona? I love Sedona. Been there several times.
Patricia
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A moaning-and-groaning motivational speaker?!?! Yeah, no thanks.
My cats can take anything you throw at them. Especially Lila. She’s the fighter in the family.
Sedona was phenomenal! I will write about it and all the other 30-before-30 items soon. I’ve been so behind in the writing and there’s so much to write about.
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This is why I tend to mostly hide out on group pages on Facebook. There just isn’t that much to share about me that’s interesting, and too much from others that’s either bragging or whining. Or that’s so personal I feel squicky reading it. Political ranters, I unfollow. You post funny stuff, so that’s always welcome, as are cute dog and cat pics!
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Well, I’m glad to see at least you and Jessica appreciate my witicisms. I really wish there were a sarcasm font so people who don’t “get” it would at least understand.
I also enjoy a good cat or dog video and a cute kid picture now and then. And on occasion I’ve found a good recipe or two on FB. I guess you have to take the good with the bad or hide out.
Thanks for not hiding from me. I appreciate you.
Patricia
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I know what you mean – sometimes I might fall into one of your categories but I have never run 47 miles and complained about it. I’ll admit I over share at times – especially when I am away from home as I was in DC for Spring Break. But I see my feed with political stuff – on both sides – that I just skip and think, really? So, is it Facebook or people? I’m not sure, but I do know a few people who aren’t on Facebook who give me the load when we talk. I know I can choose to read or skip past the post and skip the like or comment.
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I’m with you Clay on just skipping over those particular posts that “irk” me. It just seems to me like I’m seeing a trend in posts that are both good and bad, which confuses me.
Now having a discussion with someone in person is a whole nuther ball of wax. At least it’s not out there for the whole world and their brother to see.
Thanks for stopping by. As always, make the day count!
Patricia
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I’ve been off social media for most of the past year due to family commitments, so when I’m on there, I want to be entertained by the posts I read. Which means I want to smile and laugh…although occasionally I appreciate a post that makes me cry. But please, no whining! 🙂
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Oh Sheila, I hope everything is okay with your family. I know that sometimes family can consume your life.
I’m so with you on the whining. Just stop already people. Life is way too short to spend that much time obsessing about how miserable things are. Find the joy, or create the joy and pass it along.
Thanks for taking the time to stop by and comment. I appreciate the support.
Patricia
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Facebook is like being in high school! With all the cliques – the nerds, stuck ups, jocks, bullies, clowns, divas, cool kids, burnouts, populars, etc.
It’s like living our high school nightmares all over again!
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Wow, I’ve never thought about it that way, but you’re probably right. I still firmly believe that if most of the people who post all the time are confronted face to face, they won’t have anything to say. FB is great for introverts.
Thanks for visiting Phil. What’s next up on the New York food blog? I’m getting hungry.
Patricia
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